Tuesday, May 17, 2011

05/17/11: Taking it slow....the beginning....

The weather was perfect this morning...chilly, but not freezing. The skies were bright enough at 5 am that I didn't need a headlamp. The birds were chirping and the rabbits were out in full force!!!

I set out to run a short two miles today. Nothing fast, nothing furious...just two solid miles.

Good news, I made it the two miles.

Bad news, I was walking.

I tried running...but I don't think it can even be considered running as I doubt both of my feet were off the ground at the same time.

The fronts of my lower legs were screaming....the backs of my lower legs were screaming...the insides of my lower legs were screaming.

It was ScreamFest 2011. (I give it two thumbs down.)

I backed off and walked....then tried running about half a mile later.

No change.

When I hit the one mile mark, I turned around and came back home.

If anyone saw me, they'd have thought me completely nuts. I was talking to myself. I was arguing with myself. I was consoling myself.

I'm not sure what to do.

Yes, I was having pain when I started this second round of physical therapy in April...but it was nothing like what I'm experiencing now.

Is this a case of "you're going to hurt, get used to it.....but quit trying to fix it, you're only making it worse"?

Or is it a case of "sometimes it gets worse before it gets pain, no gain?"

As of right now, I'm not running the half this weekend. I couldn't run two miles today....what am I doing thinking that I can do 13 this weekend?


My third half marathon is a DNR before I even begin.

During that mile walk back to my house this morning, the thought of a DNR was the most depressing thing ever.

But eventually my thought process turned to the future.

If I want to get things fixed and complete a full this fall, I might have to make some sacrifices along the way.

If 18 years of dance has made it impossible for me to develop any kind of solid running life style (like I've been told by many people along the way)....then I guess there's ultimately nothing I can do about it.

I'll admit...I'm a little down right now. I hate posting this on my blog....I hate not being happy happy joy joy for all of you. But I guess these down times make the up times seem all that much better, right?

I'll be up tomorrow before work again...out there trying to run. And, if I can't run, I'll walk. One foot in front of the other.

Truth be told, I have to say I'm a little excited to run the 5K this weekend instead of the half. It takes quite a bit of the pressure off my mind. I know quite a few people who will be there doing it along with me. I won't have another medal for the rack....but even though it's cool to get them, it's not what it's all about.


Faith Ann said...

I am sooo sorry to hear that you've had some discouraging runs lately and I can understand how frustrated you must be. You're doing everything right and you're still in pain :(

Maybe you need a little break from long runs and longer distances? I know, it's the wrong time for that to happen with the start of marathon training!!

Our issues/injuries are very different, but I cannot tell you how much better my legs felt after taking a couple of months off from running. Sure, I pretty much had to start from scratch again but as I've been building my base back up, I have felt so much better. I used a stationary bike during my running hiatus to get my cardio in.

It is definitely discouraging to scale back a race... but a 5k is an enjoyable distance too :)

Good luck, I hope your team of experts is able to come up with a cause and solution soon so you can run pain-free!!!

Nej said...

@ Faith Ann - thanks for your support! It's very frustrating....but I have to remember it's only temporary. I'll be back at it and having a blast soon!!!!! :-)

Fran said...

Dear Jen, I can't even imagine how the pain feels for you but I'm really sorry you're so down at the moment. All I can do is hope and pray that you will soon be running without pain again.

It's okay to be down and disappointed about that half, I know how you feel about that.

And you're not alone, if you take a moment to read my post of Monday you will see I'm experience a down time too.

Nej said...

@ Fran - I've been out of town for work, and falling behind on my blog reading. I hate that I haven't been reading while you've been going through your own down time. I'm going to try and get on today or tomorrow to get caught up.

Fran said...

Don't worry about it sweety. I just posted it yesterday so you didn't miss a lot.

Anna P said...

BUMMER!! I hope you do well in the 5K...which race are you running? I hope you heal up SOON!!

Nej said...

@ Anna - signed up to run the Gambler half. But hubby and some friends have signed up to run the 5K. I'll probably just stick with them. Actually, will probably be more fun. I need to find someone who runs roughly the same pace as I do, and we can keep each other occupied on those long 13 (and longer) runs. :-)

C2Iowa said...

You must have faith. I did not have a "good" long run for three months prior to my first full.

"... beware the dark side. Anger, fear, aggression. The dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. Consume you it will, as it did Obi-Wan's apprentice."

I will be watching for those upbeat updates.

Nej said...

I was given a basic full training plan from the "coach" of the distance running group a week or so ago. I've pretty much put it aside.

For the next few weeks, I'm just going to work on trying to keep some semblance of a fitness base.

During those weeks, I will also dutifully do my PT exercises and get as much "non workout" time with the new orthotics in my shoes as I can.

If I do the very basic Hal Higdon novice marathon training plan, I need to keep a 15 mile weekly base..and officially start training at the end of June.

So I have a month to let things settle, and not freak out too much. :-)

@ C2 - That quote relates perfectly! Have you ever noticed my blog address?

Do or do not....

I'm a doubt about it. Quitting just isn't in my bones. :-)

Anonymous said...

I know it stink to not be able to run - but keep walking. Work on cross-training. It will keep you motivated and build your muscle up while you are recovering.