Friday, February 27, 2009

February 2009

I hit rock bottom mentally. Not being able to lose any weight (or inches) was killing me. I was pushing myself at the gym....scrutinizing every bite......and nothing!


I went into a depression.....I cried all the work and at home.

For two weeks now, I haven't been to the gym...I haven't worked out...and I've been eating horribly.

You know what, I've gained no weight.

Is it too much to ask that I see some results for all my hard work?

In the beginning.....

....I was what everyone women hated. I was the chick that could eat as much or as little as she wanted...and not gain (or lose) a pound.

I could sit on my ass, or never sit change.

After getting married (and finding out that birth control pills give me migraines), I switched to the Depo Provera birth control shots. Every three months, I would go to the doctor's office and they'd give me a shot. No muss, no fuss.

My doctor warned I would gain weight right off the bat. "The average patient can expect to gain as much as 10 pounds the first 3-6 months."

OK....well, I'll just start working out more, and eating less to balance it out...right?


In the first three months I went from a size 6 to a size 8. (gulp)
In the second three months I went from a size 8 to a size 12. (double gulp)
In the third three months I went from a size 12 to a size 16!!! (&#&#%^^@*%)

On the appointment for the fourth shot, I talked to my doctor. I was in denial...but the minute she saw me, I could see it in her eyes. It was that "holy shit" look.

I didn't know what to do, and broke down crying in her office. I'm eating better, eating less, and staying active...what the heck is wrong with me?

Suffice it to say, I didn't get the 4th shot.

I'll spare you the details, but let's just say the weight gain wasn't the only side effect I was suffering from. (sigh)

After I stopped getting the shot, I went up again to a size 18...but REFUSED to buy size 18 clothes. I resorted to sweat pants and other clothing with elastic waist bands......sweatshirts......and the biggest t shirts I could find.

The gain leveled off there, and never got any worse.

But, for 7 years I tried to get some of the weight off, with no luck. I was right back to where I started in the beginning. Able to eat everything and gain nothing, able to eat nothing and not lose. I could sit, I could change.

In 2006, I had reconstructive surgery on my shoulder. For 4-5 months after the surgery I couldn't do anything. And, I was depressed about it. I ate everything I could get my hands on, and never left my couch, unless it was to go to work.

I lost weight!!!!!

I was eating like a pig, and as sedentary as they come, and I lost weight. I went down to almost a size 10 (from an 18). What the hell is up with that???

The minute I stopped taking the pain pills I needed to get me through physical therapy, was the minute the weight loss stopped. Stopped dead in it's tracks.

Now, in February of 2009 (almost three years later)...I'm still almost a 10. My weight is the same and my clothes fit the same.

I keep my calorie intake between 1400-1600. I work out a minimum of three times a week (but usually 4 or 5)...for an hour at a time minimum. I've done boot camps, I drink my water, I take my multivitamins.


In every life, you will find a defining moment. A turning point. A detour on that road they call life.

How we deal with those detours is up to us. How we react, recoup, and re-evaluate is in no ones hands but our own.

This blog is here for me, and me alone. Although, visitors and friends are always welcome!!!!

I created it to talk about one thing in particular. I don't want to bore the readers of my other blog, so I brought it here. Most (many, all...) won't find their way onto it. And those that do probably won't return.

I'm not trying to win awards, entertain the masses, or get a point across. I'm just trying to be me. Regular old me, dealing with regular old weight gain. Nothing fancy, nothing exciting.....

Here's my weight gain story, in a nutshell. The beginning of the story, and what has happened since.